Way-aye. Roscoe here. And I’m to reassure you that Percy is fine, he’s lookin’ bonny, and he’ll probably be back here next week.

I have to introduce you to me and my mate Neville. I think me Mam told you all about us last August, so I’d be repeatin’ myself like, or Percy, or the like, so I’ll give you a quick rundown.

I was all happy enough in me home up on Tyneside and Neville and I had been together a while. I don’t right remember when he arrive, to tell the truth, but we’d been okay in our cage for a good while. Then one day our family left. It was all quiet for a day or so, then the landlord came in to check the house, and found us there. He was very nice about it, and gave us food whenever he visited, which was often, until Auntie Layla had room for us. Then we went to stay with her and the kiddies and all the other guineas there. We had a nice summer, lots of grass time, and then we were all neatened up and told we were going on a journey.

Well, that was a long journey!  Very comfy, mind, but still a long way. Two trains, changing boxes in Newcastle station, then a couple of hours later we got into a car and two more hours till we arrived with Mam and the boyos here.

And you know the rest because you’ve seen the film and you’ve probably got the tee-shirt.

We’ve been havin’ a neat time here. We like our cage and enjoyed the grass time. Then Christmas arrived. It’s kind of a big deal here, with photos with the santa hats and all.

Then we got our Christmas present.

It’s a lovely box with grass on the outside and grass and hay and lovely herby things on the inside. Oh yes, we got that super furry tunnel, too. We like that.

At least it was a nice box. Mam’s going to put the photos up for me to show you the lifecycle of the grassy box.  There’s just a wee bitty bit left of it now, but it’s been great fun, I can tell you. If you ever want to buy your guinea pig a great gift, I recommend it.

That’s all from me this week. Enjoy yourself, won’t you.