Under the weather?

Way-aye, Roscoe here again.

I’ve been feeling under the weather for a few weeks now. It’s a funny saying, isn’t it? But it’s just right for how I feel. When it’s sunny I feel a bit brighter, happier, wanting to get out and about. Although Mam has been saying it’s too cold to go out and the sunshine is misleading.

You know I went to see Dr Mark at the end of August. Mam was wondering about taking me back, but I told her I feel just the same, just tireder. And the tubejuice she gives me is great. I think she knows that, because I lick the tube clean for her after she’s given it to me.

So she’s not planning to take me to see him again as far as I know.

She’s been wondering what to do about Neville though. She tried to trim his teeth the other day but couldn’t see them properly. I know she wants him to have them trimmed because his forward molars have grown too long. It makes it difficult for him to eat. He’s much slower eating, anyway, so I get to all the best bits before he can, which Mam says is not fair.

Her phone beeped late last night after she’d gone to bed, and this morning she said “it’s from Vedra, boys, with a person to phone about teeth.”

So she’s found someone not too far away to take Nev to have his teeth trimmed. I’m not sure where yet, or when, as she had to leave a message for her. But I’ll tell you as soon as I know.

Nev was a little light when she weighed us this weekend. But not too bad. He lost what Locksley had put on. Locksley is growing! He’s half as big again as what he was when he arrived. Well, that was over four weeks ago. Babies do that, grow, you know. He weighs 450gms now. That’s about 1000 less than me. So he’s a third of my size.

I chat to them both through the end panel now. Ludo is getting curious, which is good. He’s taking cucumber from Mam, too. And after we’ve gone in after our run, Mam’s been letting them have a free run, too. Apparently they’ve learnt about coming into the tent to go back. They saw us do it once, and they caught on immediately.

With brains like that, they’ll be part of the family in no time.

See you next week. Hopefully we’ll all be feeling better and the sun will shine a bit.


Roscoe xxxxx

PS Mam says we star in her short story on her blog this week – on Wednesday.

Hay crisis averted!

Way-aye, Roscoe here again.

Someone asked why I say Way-aye. It’s a friendly greeting where I come from. You might say Hai, hi or hello. I say way-aye. So does Nev. Biggles says Hello, and so does Mam.

Hay! Is another greeting I suppose, but Mam says when it is, it’s usually spelt hey. No, I’m talking Hay, that wonderful stuff that makes up 80-90% of our diet, depending on whether we’re getting grass or not.

Hay is lovely stuff. Or should be. It should smell sweet, taste crunchy. It fills up our bellies, and helps us grind our teeth down. Our teeth grow all the time, so they need to be kept down. That’s why we eat all the time. Biggles takes breaks between his eating for more eating, we take breaks for sleep. I think Biggles eats in his sleep. Mam says I’m exaggerating, and get on with it.

We also sit on it, play with it, and enjoy it during our run time with hay-in-a-box!

When we moved here we tried a few different types of hay available locally, and also some Mam had brought down from Norfolk, which we liked best. But then she started getting it delivered from Haybox.

It comes in huge boxes, but small enough to store next to the armchair in the summerhouse. She gets two 5kg boxes delivered on subscription. Before Bertie died we got it every six weeks, and then we only needed it every eight weeks.

This weekend Mam was in a panic because she’d lost a box of hay. Well, the one we were using was running out and she only got it in early September. And we’re only just past early October. She wondered where the second box had gone, and then realised… With the two littlies each eating as much as one of us, and not going out on the grass so much, we’d eaten the whole of the second box in two weeks!

She sorted it out for an urgent delivery with the lovely Richard at Haybox, and it’ll be here tomorrow. She says we needn’t panic because we’ve got at least one week’s supply of hay that she made in the summer stored carefully away. She also said that when she had six pigs before she got through a 2kg bag a week, so she suppose with three cages to look after, and Locksley growing, 2kg a week now is about right, and she’s changed the order to every five weeks.

Lots of parcels arrived this week. There’s one that looks like a calendar and another that looks like a pillow that she’s put on our shelf. She said “those are for Christmas.” Oooh, presents! Pillows and calendars don’t sound that exciting, though.

So all’s well here, and Ludo ate his cucumber last night, when Mam put it in front of him in his snugglesack. Locksley took it from Mam’s hand, although he was still sitting in his tunnel at the time. And Locksley’s over 400 grams now.

And Mam keeps waking up late and giving us late breakfast. She says she’s gone onto GMT now it’s past the equinox, whatever that all means. Sigh. Mam.

See you next time


Roscoe xxxxx

They’re funny chaps. Very shy.

Way-aye, Roscoe here again.

Ludo and Locksley have been here over a week now. They’re funny chaps. They’ve spent most of their time in their tunnel, only coming out to eat.

Well, Locksley zooms around every now and then, and if Ludo’s out eating sometimes he popcorns, which is something I gave up long ago. I think it means he’s happy in his new place, but he doesnt talk to me, or anyone else, so how are we to know?

At first Mam put them in their carry box when she cleaned their cage in the morning, but this weekend that changed. She put out a few of our garden run panels and made a small run for them, big enough to have the hay box in and run around it. The first day we each went over, but they ran away, so yesterday I didnt bother. Biggles went over again, but he didnt say anything to them, just stood an looked. Maybe he’s right. Maybe they just need to get used to us, and realise we aren’t going to hurt them.

They usually come out into their run in the evening. If Mam’s at her computer, they’ve got used to that, but at first if she even turned to look at them they’d run and hide. Now Mam can turn on her chair and they’ll continue whatever they were doing. If she stands up, mostly they run, although Ludo didn’t actually run until she took a step towards the door yesterday. So he’s getting used to what goes on here.

As for the rest of us, we’re fine. The weather’s been wet, and it’s been very cloudy. We had the light on in the morning as well as the evening yesterday.

I’ve been feeling a bit rough, but Mam gives me some nice medicine in the mornings which makes me feel better all day. Then there’s our biscuits. It used to be just me that got them, but Neville and Biggles do too, now. We love those. They really make me feel young again. At biscuit time Mam has some other biscuits for the Ls. She says they don’t need our biscuits, but they should get a treat when we do. Not that they take them from her yet. Ludo doesn’t even eat cucumber in the mornings yet. Locksley takes it from her hand at cuddle time now. Mam says Ludo will come around in his own good time.

I haven’t got any new photos today, sorry. It’s been a bit dark.

See you next time

Love, Roscoe xxxxx

Say hello to Ludo and Locksley!

Way-aye, Roscoe here! And I’m all happy and excited (and wet as I had Spot-on behind my ears to make sure I didn’t have any itchers itching me.)

We have new boys! Now we are Five!

I’m going to get Mam to tell you more about them, because I don’t understand what she’s saying. It can’t be right. And if she says it, you’ll know I haven’t made it up.

I meant to interview Mam with your questions, but I’ll do that another time.

So, Mam went out on Wednesday and came home on Thursday with Ludo and Locksley. Ludo is the baby. No, that’s wrong. Locksley is the baby. In a strange twist, they are named after characters in her Princelings books. The rest of us have characters in her Princelings books named after us. Even Neville and me. We’re in the new one coming out on Thursday. You can buy it on special offer until mid-October.

Mam with Locksley and Ludo in their tunnel. Nev and I are eating hay in the background


Ludo is a black and white (with a tan splash on his behind) smooth-haired guinea pig. He’s about eighteen months old. How do you know that?


“He’s got very fine nails, Roscoe. Your nails were already quite thick when you came to me, so I knew you were well over two years old. Ludo is definitely less than two, and from his size Auntie Sophie and I think he’s closer to one year old than two.”

Okay. How did he come to be in rescue? I didn’t understand what you said about a hutch.

“I’m not sure I understand either. Sophie told me that someone had bought a hutch from a person locally, through an ad online or in a paper, and when she got it home she discovered a guinea pig in it. They contacted the hutch’s former owner, who said they didn’t want it. They only have sows, so the piggy, who they called Boris, came to Sophie’s and he’s been there about a month or two.”

So was he all wild? Had they just ignored him for ages?

“I don’t know. It’s something I’d like to ask, too. He looks very well now, and not skinny at all, although he’s quite light (1 kg), but that’s probably because he’s still young.”

It explains why he’s so scared, though. Mam agrees with me. She’s noticed in particular he’s scared of things moving above him. She thinks he’s suffering from agora-fobia because he’s only been in dark hutches for most of his life. So far he mainly stays in his snuggle tunnel, but Neville does that, too.

But once she’s picked him up he’s okay, and sat nicely for his first red towel photo. He’s got very good silky hair and he’s very smart-looking. He rumbled at me through the bars though. I thought he was probably nervous, so I just smiled politely and chatted back quietly, like Mam does.


Mam said she thought he was grey and maybe he’ll turn out to be a Rex and look like Biggles. But today she thought he was a slate and might have longer softer hair. He’s full of beans and doing everything a baby should, including giving her a look that reminded her of Dylan when he was the same age. Oops. Can we cope with another Dylan?


He was born in the wild and came into rescue when he was just a few days old, along with his mam, brother and sisters. Mam says he’s entirely normal for his age.

That means trouble, I reckon.

“Yes, but only of the good kind.”

If you say so, Mam.

So that’s our new boys, and it’s really nice to have them living next door, even if they’re very quiet at the moment. Well, Ludo’s quiet. Locksley is constantly squeaking when he’s investigating the cage and popcorning. Ludo popcorned in the evening, so he must be settling in. But mostly they hide in their tunnel.

Come to think of it, they sit side by side in that tunnel. Even Bertie filled it completely, and he was not as big as me.

I’ll update you next week. Bye for now…

Roscoe xxxxx

In which I interview myself

Way-aye, Roscoe here. It’s been a nice week, because we went out in the garden most days. And Mam seems happier about something, although we’re not getting Chas and Dave to live with us.

I’m not sure what happened, but I know at the start of the week Mam did a video of us and our houses and where we have cuddles and the outside run and everything. Then she tried to phone Auntie Anna on Friday but didn’t get through. And now she’s going to see Auntie Sophie this week to bring back some new piggies for our empty run. Hooray!

I thought I might interview Mam with your questions. I might do that later, but I’ll answer them myself today.

1 What do you like best for food?

I like grass, and the herby things Mam gives us, and carrots. But I really like the special biscuits Mam gives us in the early evening. They’re delicious and they make me feel great.

2 What do you like the least that your mum has to do to care for you?

Like everyone else, it’s nail trimming. It’s very scary.

3 When do you get excited and make loud noises?

I very rarely make loud noises. It’s not dignified. Even when she says ‘biscuit’, I just run to the side and look interested. Okay, I sometimes stand up on the bars to look extra interested..

4 Have you always been called Roscoe?

No, it was Auntie Layla than called me Roscoe, and I think it suits me. Mam says it reminds her of Emperor Roscoe who was a DJ on a pirate radio station. I thinks that’s why we’re more or less pirates in her books .

4a Do you know if Mam changes your names or leaves them as they are.

She told me yesterday that if she brings Peanut & Pistachio home, they’re having their names changed. But I think mostly she leaves us with the names we come with, unless she’s fostering like she did with the three littlies last year, who had codenames or temporary names till they found their home..

5 What’s your least favourite food, and is there a food she really wishes you’d eat that you dislike?

Mam gives us lots of strange things I’ve never had before. She’d like us to eat all of them. Beans and tomatoes, I don’t like them but Biggles and Bertie loved them, so I try them if she offers them, but… nah. Fruit. She tries us with this stuff called fruit. I don’t like it. I’m coming around to red pepper, though.

6 Have any of you ever had to share your homes with animals other than humans and other guinea pigs? How would you feel about it if Mam decided you should, and brought something else home rather than more guinea pigs?

I think there was a dog at the last place we lived. There are dogs next door that bark sometimes. I know Mollie (and Joshua) have dogs, but I wouldn’t like them I like it’s just guinea pigs and Mam.

So there we have it. I hope we have some new people to introduce next week. At last. It’s been very depressing having an empty cage next to us.

Mam says it’s the equinox in the next couple of days. We’ve been here with all the furniture for six months. I like it here, except for missing Bertie.

Bye for now

Roscoe xxx

Neville’s turn!

Way-aye, Roscoe here.

It’s been a nice weekend, although Mam says today will be hot. By the end of the week it’ll be cool again, and autumn will be here.

I don’t know how she knows. Maybe she asks someone.

I’ve been asking someone somethings today. I heard what Mam told Auntie Noelle about Biggles. Maybe I didn’t exactly ask him politely. Well, maybe. Anyhow, I’ve asked Neville politely. Even though I had to chase him around the run to get him to stop and answer me.

Hi Neville, welcome to the blog and please would you answer my questions. Well, they aren’t my questions, mostly. Our readers asked them, so please be nice.

Okay. Although I’m always nice with Aunties.

Of course you are.

1 What do you like best for food?

Mmm, food. Grass, carrots and cucumber. Hay. Basil. Fennel. Lots of things, really.

2 What do you like the least that your mum has to do to care for you?

I hate having my nails cut. I don’t mind having my hair cut, except when she has to do around my bottom, because I’m always a bit nervous the scissors might slip.

3 When do you get excited and make loud noises?

Mostly if I think you’re getting food and I’m not. Sometimes if everyone seems to have disappeared. I get excited when it’s biscuit time but there’s no need to make loud noises to get Mam’s attention. She’s very good at that.

4 Have you always been called Neville?

No, don’t you remember? We had different names before we got left behind and those people disappeared. I can’t remember what they were, though. I like the name Neville. I think it suits me.

4a Do you know if Mam changes our names or leaves them as they are.

She didn’t change our names from what Auntie Layla gave us. I don’t think she’s planning on changing the names of the boys she gets from Auntie Anna, either. If she gets Chas and Dave, anyway.

5 What’s your least favourite food, and is there a food she really wishes you’d eat that you dislike?

I’m not keen on beans. I know Biggles adores them, but, well, I’ve started to try them. Mam gave us all sorts of funny things when we first arrived. Do you remember? We only knew cauliflower and lettuce and carrots. Then we learnt about kale – that’s yummy – and spinach, and chard and herbs, and celeriac… it’s all yummy. Pepper – still not sure about that, but I quite like it now.

6 Have any of you ever had to share your homes with animals other than humans and other guinea pigs? How would you feel about it if Mam decided you should, and brought something else home rather than more guinea pigs?

Weren’t there some other animals at the old place? I can’t remember. They made funny noises, anyway. I don’t know if Mam would get anyone other than guinea pigs. She likes birds though. It would be okay, I expect.

Thank you Nev, that was grand. You can go back in your tunnel now.

I think Mam’s taken it away to wash it.

Yes, it’s drying in the sun outside. I reckon we’ll be going out soon, too. The grass is very good at the moment. Mam says to enjoy it while we can. So I will

See you next week, everyone.


Roscoe xxx