An Interview with Biggles

Way-aye, Roscoe here again.

We’re all very disappointed because Auntie Anna couldn’t come to see us last week as she was too busy. She won’t let Mam have new piggies till she’s been here. Mam’s very disappointed too.

So, thank you for all your questions. This is what happened when I put them to Biggles.

1 What do you like best for food?

I like carrots best. And cucumber best. And carrot tops. Mummy doesn’t give me carrots very much, though, because she says they make me too heavy.

2 What do you like the least that your mum has to do to care for you?

I hate having my nails cut. And I don’t like it when Mummy brushes my hair up the wrong way, or delves into it to find whether there’s some hay stuck in it. I don’t really like her touching my back half much at all, really.

3 When do you get excited and make loud noises?

I don’t much. Except if it looks like I’m not getting some food when you are. I make small noises and chat to Mummy when she cuddles me, though.

4 Have you always been called Biggles?

Yes

4a Do you know if Mam changes our names or leaves them as they are.

I don’t think she’s changed anyone’s name for ages. You’d have to ask her.

5 What’s your least favourite food, and is there a food she really wishes you’d eat that you dislike?

(long pause) Chinese leaf. I don’t like the thick stalks in it. We haven’t had it for ages, though. I think I should point out to your readers that Mummy’s main aim at present is to make me starve to death.

I don’t think that’s true. Mam told me you were very heavy, though. 1.725 kgs. That’s very heavy. I’m only 1.4 kgs, and so’s Neville.

Sniff. She’s not even giving me a proper bowl of pellets now.

I think I’ll ignore that. The next one is from Mollie, who’s a dog.

6 Have any of you ever had to share your homes with animals other than humans and other guinea pigs? How would you feel about it if your Mum decided you should, and brought something else home rather than more guinea pigs?

I don’t know. Dogs make loud noises, well, the ones next door sometimes do. Mummy chases the cats out of the garden, so I don’t think she’d have them. I don’t know. As long as I still got fed and cuddled it would be okay, I expect.

Well, thank you, Biggles, for that insight into your world. And it’s only next door to mine!

If nothing else happens this week, next week I’ll give you Neville’s replies. I might interview Mam, too.

Grass. I forgot to say my favourite food is grass.

(sigh) love

Roscoe xxx